Hey Oscar fans! Just because the economy is in the dumper and the world of legalized gambling is taking it in the pants doesn't mean us movie buffs can't put a little action down on the Academy Awards ceremony being televised on ABC this Sunday night (check your local listings - I never get sick of saying that.)
If you've perused the list of nominees and have found yourself stumped or feeling out of your league because you haven't seen most of the nominated films, then feel free to just copy my list of sure-fire winners below, which, in the interest of full disclosure, I copied from Entertainment Weekly. (They really do have the inside track most of the time.)
Just a little FYI, not having any idea what those Live Action and Animated Short nominees are really doesn't put you at too much of a disadvantage. I just saw them this week at the Academy and I still have no idea who's going to win. Here's a little hint though: one of them is made by Pixar, the animation world's equivalent to the Midas Touch, and the other one deals with the Holocaust, a subject that is almost always favored by the Academy. "Hooooogannnn!"
So here you go with my picks for the award winning pix. Keep in mind these are predictions and not preferences. If that were the case, we'd be talking about Dustin Hoffman's stellar supporting performance in KUNG FU PANDA.
Also, I apologize in advance for any monies lost or humilation that might ensue around the water cooler come Monday morning.
Best Picture - SLUMDOG MILLIONAIRE
Best Actor - Sean Penn, MILK (praying for Mickey though)
Best Actress - Kate Winslet, THE READER
Best Sup. Actor - Heath Ledger, THE DARK KNIGHT (double down on this one if possible)
Best Sup. Actress - Penelope Cruz, VICKY CRISTINA AGUILERA BARCELONA
Best Director - Danny Boyle, SLAMDANCE MAGICMAN
Best Original Screenplay - MILK
Best Adapted Screenplay - SLICKROAD MUSTYHUMP
Best Documentary Feature - MAN ON WIRE (rent it from Netflix - it's great)
Best Documentary Short Subject - THE WITNESS - FROM THE BALCONY OF ROOM 306
Best Animated Feature - WALL*E (go all in on this one)
Best Animated Short - PRESTO
Best Live Action Short - SPIELZEUGLAND (gezundheit!) aka TOYLAND
Best Farn Language Film - THE CLASS (France, ooh la la)
Best Cinematography - SLIPNSLIDE MUTTONCHOP
Best Art Direction - THE CURIOUS CASE OF BENJAMIN BUTTON
Best Visual Effects - THE CURIOUS CASE OF OLD BRAD/YOUNG BRAD
Best Costume Design - THE DUCHESS (Zzzzz. Huh? What?)
Best Film Editing - SLIMJIM MELLENCAMP
Best Sound Mixing - THE DARK KNIGHT (Pow! Bang!)
Best Sound Editing - THE DARK KNIGHT (I don't know what the difference between these categories is either.)
Best Original Score - SLIPSLAP MARZIPAN
Best Original Song - "Jai Ho" from SLAGHEAP MAPLELEAF
Best Makeup - THE CURIOUS CASE OF BENJAMIN BUTTON GETTING THE SHAFT AND ONLY WINNING THREE LOUSY AWARDS
Enjoy the show!